The day I quit Facebook

I quit Facebook.
I actually did.

The guy who was "always online" , always posting, commenting within 30 secs of a new post/status message,  last logged onto Facebook 26 days ago. It wasn't easy , but I did it.

You all might be having the same questions in your minds : " Why? " , "How?" "Are you freakin' mad? "

Well, it all started as a social experiment; I wanted to see the effects/benefits/cons of social networking on my life. And as the saying goes "You don't miss the water until it's gone" , I decided to take a break from Facebook (I'll just use "Fb" in my further references).

Photocredit : ecolumns.net

It's not like this was the first time I attempted to do this; my first attempt was an utter failure, I logged on within 45 minutes of de-activating my account. That was a few months ago.
This time , my resolve was stronger, I decided to make another attempt.

As I stared at the Blue/white screen displaying a questionnaire asking me to select "why I was leaving Facebook" and that "Person ABC and XYZ were going to miss my presence" , I wondered, would I be able to make it? Would I be able to stay away from the buzz and activity of the Social Network? How could I stay in touch with many of my friends living in far off places? Well, only one way to find out. I hit the button.

The first day off the grid was the hardest; I found myself spontaneously loading the website while I was on a voice chat with mom and dad, only to realize that I'd deactivated my account.And I was quite restless, all the time I was thinking," what is Mr.A upto today? ", "wonder if B.Inc has any special offers for Fb fans today",
"oh its Mrs.C's birthday!If only I could post a greeting on her wall!".

But I also realized that I was now getting a lot more time for myself; I could now take a 30 min power nap at noon post-lunch rather than a measly 15 mins. I also started to spend more time on informative websites , and I started reading as well! It'd been ages since I'd read a decent novel and now since I was free of the routine-disruptive Fb, I had all the time in the world to do so.

My Fb addiction had also made me a bit of an attention-seeker ;I'd post an image/photo/internet meme and wait for someone to "like" it, a behavior akin to a predator seeking its prey.Leaving Fb, put an end to those tendencies.

Another thought I had was, "Well, I've left Fb, surely my 500+ friends are gonna miss my presence." The stark reality is : they didn't (most of them anyway). I bet my dollar that a few of them still don't realize I'm no longer there on Fb. Its not that I'm some weirdo who lives in a the middle of nowhere in a trailer,with eccentric tendencies / strange fetishes.The fact is ,Fb is such a large collage of information / events , its easy to get lost in it.

Also, another thing I realized was that though I was no longer on Fb, I was able to get in touch with most of my friends through other media (Twitter, Email and the Mobile phone). Sure, I lacked the versatility of interacting with everyone on the same platform but hey, I was able to do it.
So, a little more than 3 weeks later, I'm still Fb free and I'm loving it.

Only regret : Why do all the companies require you to login with your Fb ID for those lucky giveaway draws ! :(

UPDATE : After 5 weeks of being Fb free, I finally decided to login and well, apart from a few catchy music videos and a wedding invite or two, there wasn't much happening that piqued my interest.Perhaps the only good thing I require Fb for is to promote my blog posts ! :P

Books vs the Internet : An Essay

These days , one can source any kind of information from the internet ; be it the daily headlines , recipes for Yorkshire pudding or medical information on how to treat Uncle Joe's frequent heartburn episodes.
The internet has it all.
Or does it?
Does staring for hours in front of a glowing computer screen trump the experience of flipping through the pages of a book?
Do you feel the same level of accomplishment when you dig out information on Wikipedia as when you referenced the same on the Almanac or The Encyclopedia Brittanica?

Source : caribarena.com

For those of you who say that the internet is also a way to pass time, I can justify as well as counter this argument. In all fairness, the internet is definitely a good way to pass time in situations which require you to exercise patience, which in the fast-paced world of today, is becoming increasingly difficult.So yes, a quick log-in on Facebook or a Twitter update would definitely help in passing those monotonous moments.
But conversely, immerse yourself in a novel or a magazine and you'll hardly realize how quickly time flies.

The internet as a cure to chronic boredom. Really? So ,opening and closing Facebook and your email inbox every 10 minutes cures your boredom? Maybe a few tweets, a few photo uploads, perhaps watching the grey line of a YouTube video of cute fuzzy kittens advance agonizingly as it buffers, or reading this article on my blog at the end of it all because you already did everything you could do for the moment?

Alternatively, once you pick up a book , there aren't many things which come into your mind. As one-dimensional as flipping through pages may seem, it enables us to push or minds to the limit, helping us visualize, imagine, opine, innovate.
Books are the cornerstone for evolution and revolution.
"The Republic" by Plato ,The works of Shakespeare ,Charles Dickens , Das Kapital by Karl Marx, "The Prince" by Machiavelli are literary masterpieces which either inspired change, portrayed the conditions that prevailed at the time or offered a ray of hope in the darkness.

Sure, you could download ebooks from Amazon.com , but the experience wouldn't essentially be the same.
At the same time, you wouldn't really want to purchase a book everytime you need reference for a small paragraph of info; not unless you have a reading room that parallels the Smithsonian and the finances of say, Warren Buffet.

Conclusion : I certainly have no qualms about searching for information on the world wide web, as it's definitely faster and more accessible, but nothing beats the thrill and sense of achievement of flipping through the pages of a book.

P.S : I thought of writing this as I was going through a pile of Readers' Digest. Kinda proves a  point. :)

Awake till daybreak

A preview of what was to come !

You must be wondering why I started my post with a photograph. Well, I'll tell you, but be patient folks !

In an earlier post, I'd talked about my insomnia and my desire to have a blissful sleep. For a while things were great after college... You could say I slept like a baby... ( I think this phrase isn't really apt for we all know how they just love to wake up and cry at just about the time we enter dreamland; but lets leave this for another storyline ,alright?) And then , it started to happen... It started innocuously with me watching those late night tv shows ;all the amazing stuff comes on tv after 11pm! (and no, not THOSE shows). It got so bad that I would actually be awake till 5am ...and then I realized I had to do something about it.

 I tried quite a few methods infact, home remedies like drinking warm milk, warm water etc before bed, listening to soothing instrumental music, reading . and none of them were really too effective; which was when I came across an article which said that the best way to normalize sleep would be to stay awake a whole 24 hours! Apparently, by doing this I'd reset my body clock so that I'd sleep right again. Well, what did I have to lose? 

The grand finale!

Since I'd been awake all night I decided to watch the sunrise...(It'd been ages since I'd seen one... there were times I'd wake up and the sun would be overhead!)

I fixed myself a nice hot cuppa and took my position in the balcony. 

The feeling was quite refreshing, I must say ; I watched as an eagle awoke and took flight, spreading its wings, and soaring into the distance. A group of mynahs chirping and a pair of hummingbirds completed the scene...The scent of freshly baked bread from the bakery below filled the air...and a cool, pleasant breeze blew across the area...

And then, the moment; that big bright golden orb appeared over the horizon,in all its glory, scattering its rays ; the sky was painted in a myriad of colors, an absolutely divine sight , the clouds added to the beauty of the scene. 

Well, that was it really... a sunrise worth waiting for. And I'm happy to say that my insomnia vanished that very day and I've been sleeping like a log ever since.

Looking back..... 25 years and counting :))

Yup! Finally the day has arrived...I've now completed 25 years of existence on matrem terram. As I write this , a host of fireworks explode over the horizon, flooding the sky with a myriad of colors... Oh alright , I admit that was just a bunch of kids getting rid of some leftover fireworks, but no harm in winging it,eh? :)

Source : warkworthmaplesyrupfestival.ca

788,923,149 seconds on this planet,and I must say that its been rather eventful....Friendships for chocolates, the crowded school bus, the friendly Brit at my dad's workplace who claimed to have stolen my nose when I was 6 and me struggling to get it back , the nice shawarma guy who used to wave at us when our bus passed by, playing hide and seek around the school campus, the talent days at school each weekend, trips with my cousins to various theme parks, firework and laser shows, airshows, speed boat races , sleepovers,excursions,high school and board exams, my first year in college,watching movies in "Gandhi"class(budget seats), graduation, a short stint at work and all ; its been one hell of a ride..

Being born in the 80s was the best thing ever for we saw science grow at this astronomical pace; and the best part? We have the patience to figure out how it all works!We got to see the best of both old and new!From the turntable to the mp3 player, from dial-phone to smartphone, from tv to 3D to 3G,4G...Veni,vidi, vici! MAN I FEEL GOOD!

How do I plan to mark this milestone? With a cake of course,silly! A nice big cake made out of premium Belgian chocolates and dusted with edible gold ,with 25 little silver candles to symbolize my Silver Jubilee...My Surprise party planners, kindly take note of this request...I won't accept anything that falls short of my demands...If you do, prepare to face my wrath ! Muwahahahha!

For those expecting a treat ; ask and thou shalt receive :)
Cheers all! And I hope the next 25 years are as eventful as the first! :D

Paparazzi

The wait seemed like eternity; he hadn't moved from his vantage point since he set up his equipment a few hours ago.Timing was critical.He knew that he had to act with stealth and perfect timing if he had to pull it off.

Source : img.movieberry.com

A single wrong move, and he'd be in trouble...well, not really as he had his "friends" in really high places who could get him out with a single phone call. but yes,his hours of planning and stalking would all be for nought.

Yes, the life of a paparazzi was no bed of roses; but it  required a certain degree of courage and passion , not to mention patience. 

He would spend days following his target, monitoring his/her every move, appointments , residence, friends, none escaped his eye.There was a certain thrill to it, akin to a predator stalking his prey. His adrenaline would go into overdrive when they tried to avoid him by covering their faces, entering through back doors and going past deserted alleyways. He wasn't always successful though ; there were those few times when he'd been escorted off the property of some famous personalities, broken camera lens in tow;and sometimes a nosebleed or two, even an occasional black eye...but he wasn't one to give up.

One must eat. I do believe that hunger makes man do extraordinary things, and in his case, it involved getting pictures of famous personalities in their most vulnerable state.

Today was no different, the stage was set, and the show about to begin. Finally, a luxury sedan appeared in the driveway, the windows were rolled down, the perfect chance! He adjusted the lens, taking care not to make any movement to draw attention. The car drew nearer ....Snap! Done! he thought aloud in his excitement which attracted the security guards' attention... Time to go! He took off in a flash; lens,camera and all, climbing over the compound wall in the process, before disappearing into the busy evening crowd...

Life as a med intern and bachelor - EP6 - Cure for the b***h

photocredit layoutsparks.com

No folks, you haven't read my title wrong....I don't plan to do a write-up on mushrooms from the netherworld anytime soon.

Perhaps all of you have had atleast one of these in your workplace. In fact, I may even go further to say, any workplace would be incomplete without one of these despicable characters; just like every comic book has a villain.

A few characteristics are worthy of note:

The workplace b***h for some inexplicable reason, happens to be present in the very department you work in.

He/she somehow happens to notice any minor goof-up that you apparently thought was made in utmost secrecy.

He/she is a creative genius....remember that small goof-up we just talked about earlier? Apparently, the effects from that goof-up were equivalent to a nuclear bomb blowing up in your backyard...Kudos to the guy who said that imagination and innovation go hand-in-hand...Wait a second, I think it was me; I kick myself in disgust.

Another characteristic of this creature , who I will henceforth be calling "it" (definitely not human) is its ability to watch your every move with utmost diligence...It also possesses some sort of telepathic ability; the boss is never too far when it's around.

It somehow manages to portray itself as the victim of one of your dastardly diabolical schemes which you have no idea of in the first place and strangely expects you to soften your stance towards it.

A more sophisticated subspecies exists in med school, I've come across quite a few of them during my rotations.

Surely , all of you must be thinking , "Why tell me everything that I already know! Just tell me how to get rid of it!"

Allow me to let you in on "The cure for the b***h" , a sure shot cure for all those poor folk who've been victims of the horrendous acts perpetrated by these beings....

1. Pretend they don't exist; while this may initially lead to an escalation of their atrocities, they get bored quite easily - they have the attention span of a goldfish.
2. Practice working in stealth mode; the less they see, the less they know, less damage control. You may want to take some lessons in speed from Flash Gordon as well.
3. Contemplate purchasing a dartboard, place their picture on it and take a few shots...leave it in plain view...
4. Confront them and tell them that you're in reality a werewolf that preys on b***h blood.
5. Look for a dealer in adamantium exoskeletons.
If all fails, contact the terminator. I'll be back!

The Decision : A misadventure

LIFE IS A RACE IF U DON'T RUN FAST U WILL BE LIKE A BROKEN UNDA (hindi for egg)! - This statement was made by a certain professor Viru "Virus" Shahastrabuddhe in a Movie that many of us learned to love...

This statement isn't without its flaws though; for one,an egg, being an inanimate object, doesn't run; infact, running may be the exact force required to break this egg...now that would leave quite a mess wouldn't it?

Photocredit : selfempoweringtips.com

So let's leave the eggs in the tray and touch another topic - The Rat Race... What's this obsession with man to compare himself to animals if he considers himself to be far superior to them? But lets leave the criticism for another day, shall we?
Having finished med school, it was imperative to do one of the two options I had in front of me :

1.Get a job and join the mainstream.
2.Take a year off and prepare for what we call entrance examinations to do my masters(Where a large number of candidates compete for a miniscule number of available posts)

It is at this point when, walking along the beach at Panambur (scenic spot in Mangalore) trying to come to a decision, that I stumble on this bottle and you know the rest - this genie comes out and grants me 3 wishes. Straight out of the Arabian Nights ,you think? Well, it would be, but the ending was sort of different from this one...So if you haven't nodded off to dreamland yet, read on :

I decided that I'd use the help of my new found genie to help me make a choice...

Photocredit people.tribe.net

Scenario 1:
I'm a Resident at a hospital in the coastal state of Kerala, God's own country...Life's pretty neat, I've got my own room, and I have fish fried in coconut oil with rice, gravy and mango pickles almost daily, lots of beautiful nurses to flirt around with ; you know, the works. My tranquil routine is interspersed with people who decide to pay me a visit just because "the hospital was open and they thought they'd get their blood pressure checked", the guy who woke me up in the middle of the night for an emergency which turned out to be an itchy groin, the ladies who, leaving all the other residents with time on their hands decide that they should get into labor the day I'm on duty and the senior medicos who think I should show more "enthusiasm". Whaaaaat?!?! Scene 1 ...CUT!

Scenario 2:
After a whole year of cramming up every sentence of every major medical textbook in my head, I qualify for a position to pursue my masters in a relatively good hospital.I pace through the wards like the king of kings ,stethoscope dangling like the snake around Lord Shiva.
The patients,my loyal subjects, love and respect me.Some of them at times ,bring me offerings to receive my blessings while my royal council look on. My rule is constantly under threat and as such I have to constantly monitor my subjects; failure to do so earns the wrath of my superiors, who then make me undergo penance, a few hundred pages of reading would suffice.In the end it would all be for the best , people tell me....Fade to black...CUT!

Having lived both lives and having used two of my three wishes, the genie asked, "What's your final wish,Master?"
"I wish......Freedom!!!" ....Guess what happened next.....?

The genie disappeared!!!!!
Guess I should've been more specific!

Silly Little Heart

Photocredit holidayteesngiftideas.com

Silly little heart, why beatest thou so,
am I in love? Nay ,I thinkest not so
Silly little heart,what sorcery is this,
why feel I to offer this maiden a kiss?


Silly little heart, why doest thou despair?
such feelings are common , surely not rare.
Silly little heart, what shall I say?
I’m just a mind, feeling I have nay.


Silly little heart, why doest thou hear me not,
have I unto thee, any injustice brought?
Silly little heart, thru happiness and gloom,
all you do is go boompity-boom.


Silly little heart, what ails you so,
what causeth you this pain , this sorrow?
Silly little heart, wilst thou find a cure
to keep thee beating forever, happy and pure?

The Reverse Midas touch : Bad luck charm

Photocredit collectingtokens.files.wordpress.com

Timo and misfortune were best friends...In fact, there was nothing that they would do without the other's company. They first met during elementary when Mrs.Hopkins asked them to draw a sunset...While everyone else got busy doing outlines of the mountains , birds or the big yellow sun at the top of the page, Timothy ran into a few technical difficulties; for one, his pencil tips seemed to break off for no apparent reason, and the sharpener holder he was using almost miraculously broke, scattering its contents ; the aftermath of this scene saw him and his benchmate Zach sneezing uncontrollably till the end of the class.It was the first time they'd ever met, but lady misfortune (rather little miss misfortune ) took an instant liking to Timo.
Remember the popular line "for your friends are my friends and my friends are your friends" from the children's classic "The More we get together" ? Well, apparently miss misfortune took this song to heart,for whoever was around Timo, got a present or two from her, whether it was a missing penny or a torn shoelace or a jammed trouser zip.And so it was , all throughout his school years;One Christmas, Santa's beard got eaten up by rats,Another time, the Sodium chloride in the chemistry lab suddenly transformed into sulfuric acid as if the molecules had a mind of their own and yet another instance where the video game console crashed inexplicably and recovered as soon as Timo left.

I first met Timo during my high school years,he had recently moved into my apartment complex.We had a nice chat when we got stuck in the elevator for a whole hour...The unsuspecting me soon became a good friend of Timo..The misfortunes kept coming, but I was of the belief that there was always an explanation for anything.. Like, my Nintendo gameboy was definitly well past its usability when it stopped working, I blamed Microsoft Windows when the blue screen of death kept showing up on my desktop computer, I blamed chinese manufacturers when my almost brand new treadmill's motor blew up...In fact, it took me quite a bit of time to join the dots...Most of these "mishaps" occurred when Timo was around.In being friends with Timo, I had also introduced my self to miss misfortune.

Fortunately for me, a year later , I had to move elsewhere for college ... Miss misfortune stayed behind...I think I can blame her for me losing Timo's contact number, and I didn't hear from him for years...That was until last week, when I had to go to my childhood place on a business trip.Apparently, he was now the CEO of a well known IT company!...Now that she'd grown up , Lady Misfortune had left to make a name for herself and a husband for life ...

Life as a med intern and bachelor ep5 : Internet de-addiction

Photocredit trak.in

From my previous write-ups you must have figured out how my daily routine goes...
You must have deduced by now that I do spend a considerable time online..

For those of you visiting for the first time - Yup! Its true! I am a certified net addict....While I don't have a certificate to substantiate my claim, my internet bill would suffice as evidence. The telecom company, appreciative of my efforts, once awarded me a bill for ten grand! (a technical glitch actually, coz' I did have a bit of free internet usage but... you get the point.)

Photocredit jabulela.com

For the newbies to the internet world who wonder " what exactly is it about the net that can get you hooked ? " , believe me my friends when I say " A LOT!"
Let me lay down a few factors that contributed to my addiction:

1.Info at the click of a button - no brainer this one ...

2.Keeping in touch with people miles away - you must've figured this too

3.Opening emails of cute kittens and forwarding them lest you get struck by lightning on a sunny day.

4.Twitter - the site that allows you to post literally every thought that comes to your head and gives you the flexibility to ignore the replies.

5.Social networking - From hi5 to Orkut and now Facebook, everyone wants to know everyone...(While typing this I notice that Facebook is a word in the spell check and is not listed as an error, while Orkut has the nice wavy red line under it..another psychological victory for Zuckerberg!).. pokes kicks and hugs are the order of day...

6.Social gaming - Millions of engineers, doctors and professionals put their jobs on the line when they realised they had a latent love for farming (Anyone remember Farmville?) Zynga scored big time with many other "villes" ...In fact, the other day I went to my workplace and my superior was like "Hey ! I'm running low on energy ! Could you send me an energy pack?"

7.Skype - Clear voice and video quality and the ability to share your desktop with others is really cool when it comes to teaching newbies on how to do stuff online...

Photocredit : michellehenry.fr

So as a result my life on the internet is as follows : Wake up, open Google chrome, check mail , forward pics of funny kittens , log on to twitter and belch out every thought that was in my head during the last 60 seconds, then move on to facebook and poke every single person on my friends list, chat with the occasional bloke I actually find interesting to chat with , open up a few social games and ask for tools , send energy , etc and finally log in to skype and watch my cousin's new fish that he recently purchased get eaten up by the old ones.
Beats looking at the real world through rose colored glasses anyday doesn't it?
Note : The disclaimer I put up for my previous posts holds for this one as well ... Until next time folks! Keep visiting!

Music : How Far We've come

Photocredit : cyberius.deviantart.com

June 21st - World Music Day... Celebrating music and its evolution all over the world.
Whilst I type my blog entry , the latest Lady Gaga soundtrack emanates from my laptop speakers...
Its a wonder how far music has advanced; it is indeed a science of various notes,tunes, chords and octaves , harmonised with perfect synchrony to create one continuous stream of pure melody, that can soothe even the most savage of beasts...
Just like any science , music has evolved rapidly, and has many states ...the earliest form being the wind instruments , wherein the "Shanka" (conch) and the bansuri ( flute ) are of mythological origin...followed by other string instruments like the Sitar, Harp and the Lute ; apparently Nero, the Roman emperor played the Lute while Rome was on fire...
The piano emerged during the Renaissance era , as did the violin... Compositions by Beethoven and Mozart served well to bring these instruments to the forefront...
The early 20th century saw the advent of Jazz , and with it the saxophone , guitar, trumpet and the tuba...Post WWII saw the advent of Rock n Roll - Elvis and the electric guitar... This was the so called "Swingin'60's" as they called it...This age saw the advent of the magnetic tape audio cassette...which would soon send the vinyl record into oblivion...

Photocredit : ilounge.com

The 70s saw the emergence of a new trend of Synthesizer music ... imagine a single instrument performing the roles of a piano , violin , a guitar etc etc...!! You'd think it cudn't get any better... If so , u thought wrong...

The 80s saw more advanced Synth music along with the Golden age of Rock - Guns n Roses, Nirvana , Metallica ;teens would be seen blasting away these tracks on their walkmans; a few of their tracks still find favor with the youth of today...

The Digital age (latter 80's) saw in many new technologies, the compact disc deserves a noteworthy mention; for it ensured a longer shelf life for the music album you purchased with your monthly allowance, was fungus proof and also didn't get all entangled in your music system..It also saw the emergence of a few more genres of music - Techno , trance , hip hop and rap started getting prominence,and who could forget the emergence of pop with its king , the one and only MJ....You could call this era - The Golden age of music...

The Internet age spelled doom for cassette players; the Mp3 format combined with the option of getting "just that one good song" : u could store dozens of tracks in a single CD...portable CD players phased out the walkman and before you could say "Compact Disc", Mp3 players came to the forefront - easy to carry, rechargable battery, and flexible use pushed the portable disc player to the attic.
Its now the age of the Mp3,the torrent file - children of the present generation would never recognize a record player , a few of them may have never seen a walkman, the music device with which we ever so eagerly listened to our favourite tracks of backstreet boys , MJ , westlife or madonna...
Guess its the age of the iPod....For now...

Friends , Weight Loss and Photoshop

Photocredit : ligherleiter.blogspot.com

Photocredit : 70pounds.com

My friend Phil was obsessed with losing weight ; I'm sure many of us are but I can very much assure you that he was more obsessed with it than many of you folks...
Phil had this one aim in life , to look as slim and dashing as Brad Pitt or George Clooney in their heydays...

He devised many weight loss plans and at one stage even contemplated joining one of those "World Famous" programmes.
His first breakthrough came during college, where he suddenly and ecstatically screamed, "Whoopee!!! I'm 10 kilos lighter!". It was true, and I was happy for him; but had I known that this was the trigger for his obsession, I would have stopped him.
He then realised that his initial 10 kilo meltaway was due to a change in diet, which somehow led to him starving himself.
Phil had changed, his cheery deposition was replaced by a more unstable one, something like those radioactive isotopes... His next step involved gym workouts, which kind of worked for a while. But Phil wasn't one of those very patient blokes ,he wanted results , FAST and so, soon he was back to his starvation regimen.
One day it dawned on him to try out slimming pills...fortunately/unfortunately , he put those away quite quickly.. apparently his body thought the pills were a food source and rendered them useless.

I must add that Phil was a connoiseur for rich,tasty as well as continental food, so it wasn't unusual to see a few shawarmas or burgers make their way into his diet plan...He deserved to binge once in a while , he said.
So a few months passed and he was apparently surprised that he wasn't making progress.

But Phil wasn't the guy who would give up that easy ; he wanted to show the world that he was still the same ; slim and trim .. which led to photoshopped images on his profile pages...One of the best uses of the "skew" feature , I must admit.
It wasn't surprising that Phil never made it to our reunions, apparently he always had some appointment or the other which happened to crop up at exactly the same date and time.

I finally did manage to run into Phil though; a chance meeting at the railway station. The expression on his face was timeless "Don't recognise me, don't....don't...SHI....Hey! Wassap!"

To be fair, I must say Phil actually DID manage to lose a few pounds ; no longer did he have to visit the tailor for custom - fit clothes . But he still had a long way to go , to attain that perfect figure he always wanted... Until then, he said , photoshop is my savior !

5 Rupees

Photocredit : punjabiportal.com

It was a hot summer morning in April; not that it isn't usually hot in this month but the fact that it had rained the previous night ought to have cooled things down a bit; apparently lots of things happen without making sense these days so I guess this is one of those few...
I walked past the cobbler who sat against a wall of the Medical College ; he looked up at me, expecting a customer; on realizing the negative, he bent down, and carried on with his work, tapping and stitching the tattered shoes of an impatient schoolboy.

A few more steps brought me to my grocery store.Being a bachelor, I usually purchase provisions for a week ; sometimes my purchases would elicit weird looks, for i'm sure it would be hard to charge for something that cost just 6rupees a kilo when all i would buy was around 50gms!! I took my shopping basket to the cashier...95 Rupees! I fished out a fresh 100 Rupee note from my wallet... crisp as a cracker. The cashier accepted it with a smile and returned me a 5 Rupee note...I put the change in my wallet and headed home.

At home, I decided to count my change, when the 5 rupee note caught my attention.It had something inscribed on ,I decided to read it.

5 and 10 Rupee notes have a historical importance, each of them have their own story to tell..
IOU's which were made around 5 years ago,or perhaps someone's telephone number was urgently copied on it after a frantic but unsuccessful hunt for a piece of paper.
Or maybe a few odd calculations ,a list of names of people to call for a party,the name of the medicine pill that you wanted to buy and had forgotten the doctors slip behind but had written it down just in case....

The 5 rupee note was the poor man's post-it note...a true upholder of Gandhian virtue...These are now in short supply as 5 rupee coins have forayed into the circulation ;now the 10 rupee notes graciously offered to serve the impatient Indian,their smooth pale saffron surfaces previously untouched by pen , pencil or inksmeared fingers...

The Wannabe

Photocredit : ericatwitts.wordpress.com

"What about the children Jared?"
"What about them?"
"Who's going to take care of them till I get out?"
"Don't worry about that Hannah, I got it covered; I'm gonna get you out of here, I promise! "

CUT!

"Good show today people!! Nicole, can you come into my office for a minute?"
"You were good today! I'll pass your tape to our producer , I'll get back to you if you make the cut."

She smiled ,and left the set...
"I'll get back to you if you make the cut..."
How many times had she heard this line? 5? 10 ? She couldn't really tell....
After all, with the number of auditions she'd done , who could?

"Study hard, and you will one day make it big in life" her parents used to tell her...
How she longed to go back home, to set things right...but she couldn't ; not after she had stolen the money her father used to keep in the drawer ... "just in case you need it ", he used to say... So technically, she didn't steal the money , after all, she needed it...she'd pay them back once she became a star!! But yet, there was this guilt that pricked her day after day...

As she headed home , she stopped by a pav stall, this poor man's bread was her daily sustenance; she had to adjust her expenses on food if she had to stay in a decent neighbourhood...Besides,once she made it big, she could eat whatever she wanted,a small sacrifice compared to the success she would one day become...
The city could be a real harsh place for a single woman in her prime years...

She reached her tenement at the end of the road; the door creaked open...it wasn't a very great place, but it was all she could afford with her slim pickings, playing the role of an extra in film songs...
The dim, eerie glow of a kerosene lamp kept the place lit at night...a mosquito coil burning in a corner of the room kept away the bloodsucking insects....

The Beggar by the road

Photocredit : dpexpert.com.au

He sat there by the wall overlooking the road;in his rags and tatters and messy state one could easily have mistook him for a gunny bag on the pavement....his sense of hygiene had left him the day he emerged out of the sanctity of the womb into the outside world of the gutters...His hair had never seen blade, and his skin rough as animal skin; from him emanated a stench that would make even sewers smell like a spring field....

People passed by him without a care, sometimes just treating him as if he were a stone or some similar obstacle in their path.A few would look at him and think "Oh my! How can he be so filthy!" or "why can't these people just disappear!" and walk on, to perform their daily errands. Few of the more compassionate kind would drop a coin or two in the rusty tin placed beside him...enough for him to buy a pack of biscuits or if lucky, a loaf of bread at the end of the day to satiate his hunger...

He had been beaten and chased by a constable once or twice, but the pangs of hunger and the desire of survival are strong in the less fortunate;a day or two later he would return, to his spot by the wall...sitting with pleading eyes,searching for a bit of compassion from his fellow human beings...

Life as a med intern and bachelor - EP4 - The Aftermath

Photocredit : notaboutjackie.blogspot.com

Im sure many of you who've been to med school will have encounterd the various queries throughout the entire period of ur course that i'm going to state below:

1st year :
Why did you take medicine?
You finished dissection? Do the dead bodies smell? ( They're dead bodies FYI,you can't expect the smell of eau de cologne to emanate from them decaying remains)
Anatomy is tough na? (Do you even know what anatomy is??)
How were ur exams?1st year is the toughest isnt it? (Its a known fact people.We don't need you to keep emphasizing it)

2nd year:
You passed ?wow! how much did you get?Distinction? (Please people, this isn't a 10th grade board exam.This is med school.I'm lucky to have even cleared 1st yr!)
You go to clinics now right?Did you purchase a steth and all?Check my pulse and BP!By the way i have this swelling in my nether regions which kind of looks like a baboon's rear..would you care to take a look and tell me what it could be? (I just got into 2nd yr folks!I'm not a surgeon!Had I known what that swelling was,why would I even need to go to med school?)

3rd year:
Nothing much here...people expect you to be an advanced surgeon now.

4th year:
You must be daily studying na?Study hard, then we can get free treatment from you.(Yea right!So that's why I spent lakhs of med school fees, to be a philanthropist to you moochers!)

Internship: I won't go much into this one...I'll just quote a few.
You say that I have melanoma ? But that renowned dermatology specialist said that its just a wart?!
I have disc prolapse? But according to the tv med show,disc prolapse is the diagnosis only if I look like a contorted pachyderm?? (ooh! I know whoz gonna make you look like one soon)

So now, you've finished med school...and the euphoria of having survived the most arduous year of your life vaporises with the qn :what next?

Photocredit : ganben.blogspot.com

The first few days are spent catching up on the countless hours of missed sleep, parties, and missed sitcoms
The next few are spent rueing joining med school and missing out on the "joys"of college life, followed by gossiping with your batchmates,on how great college life was.
You are suddenly hit with the thought "I should get a job!""earn cash to get that flat screen LCD i always wanted!" , and search for GPs ( general practice ) ; your newly acquired powers of deduction , previously non-existent/non functional,suddenly go into overdrive, people are rewarded with the rare diagnoses they always wanted so as to be the talk at the dinner table.
You soon realise : Post grad is the way to greatness! ... This begins the Application form era .... Apply,download,print,attest,send.
I personally find it weird that they keep asking for a photograph "Not more than 6 months old"; its not like our facial features metamorphosize like Michael Jackson (RIP)!!
You also probably join an entrance coaching course "to keep with the trends".
Each education board also take turns in devising the ultimate way to torture applicants;For eg: The application must be attested by an officer no lower than the rank of the big poobah or else it shall be discarded and treated as a toilet accessory.
In the meantime, relatives get busy; a photoshopped image of some Miss India lookalike arrives at your door every few weeks, with a biodata,gene tree,horoscope,DNA extract and an RSVP.
(All right,guess I got a bit carried away when I stated DNA extract,but you get my drift)
Parents, eager to show that you're not an unemployed lump of lipid occupying space on furniture, push you into getting a job...which is where I stand,right now, outside the dean's office,waiting for an hour now for an interview..
Being so conscious of time,I decided to sit down and blog this post...

DISCLAIMER: Folks I would like to remind you that this post is completely a work offiction...and may or may not resemble what I or many of you folks are going through at the moment.
SO kindly read it leaving the rational part of your brain in the icebox.Until next time!
P.S:You may follow this blog by hitting the facebook or twitter button at the end of this post, or the facebook button on the page.

When time's a testing

Photocredit : coachkalpna.com

Photocredit : theoutsourcingcompany.com

When times a testing,t future looks bleak
think again about what u seek
When times a testing, u know not where
somewhere to rest,to shed a tear.

When times a testing,you cry in pain
all your efforts, seem to go in vain
When times a testing,you try to hide
all your fears, get pent up inside.

When times a testing,you know not
what had you done,for this misfortune wrought?
when times a testing,you tend to despair
for the damage done,seems beyond repair.

When times a testing,rest for the night
for on the morrow,the sun shall shine bright.
when times a testing,do not sorrow
for after testing times, better days are to follow.

Confessions of a Storyteller

Photocredit : exedes.com

I'm a really poor storyteller..I really am.

Its not that I hate stories or anything, Its just that I've been endowed with this uncanny ability to suck the life out of anything that is even remotely interesting and turn it into a piece of boring crap...

I don't know how it all began, probably might have stemmed from the intrinsic hatred that I had within me for great story tellers, egoistic attention seekers the lot!
After all,what other purpose could these people have in life? Certainly nothing, other than competing with each other to get people to listen to them and showing off to the other the size of their ever - so - increasing fan base.

Initially, I too was enchanted by these beings...Oh,if only i were able to join this elite class!And so, I did try... with the following consequences..

- Apparently my recollection of "Pirates of the Caribbean" was akin to "Tragedy of Macbeth"
- Returning from one of the blockbuster films "avatar" , I managed to keep people from watching the movie.
- almost got involved in a lawsuit for causing the director of an award-winning film to incur great losses.
- got contacted to write scripts for Ekta Kapoor teleseries ( a new low in my life ; watch her shows if you dont believe me)
- Apparently a hospital thought I would be a good replacement until they received their monthly supplies of anaesthetics.(the reason your chief surgeon fell unconscious during surgery was exhaustion and not my narration of the previous day's events)
- as a more humane form of euthanesia ( this i made up )

People who face similar experiences in their lives are free to write about their experiences in a similar fashion on a blog of their own...I need my daily number of hits...(who'd visit if my whole page were filled with gobbledygook!)

Disclaimer: For those visiting for the first time...This piece is purely fiction and any resemblance to any person dead or dying is purely co-incidental.

Mobile phones are here to stay!

Photocredit : languagelog.ldc.upenn.edu

Yup! Mobile phones are here for eternity... For those who disagree :
Here are a few situations where you'd have thought "what would I do without a cell phone?"

AT HOME :

1.Stand out in the balcony facing traffic and tell your annoying relatives that you're stuck in traffic and are unable to make it home for another 2 hours.
2.Silence the baby by playing funny noises on it or just lighting up the keypad.
3.Set up an alarm every 10 minutes to wake you in the morning, or your better half (if you're a heavy sleeper)
4.Call up someone you had forgotten even existed and wish him/her "Happy Bday" and brag about having a superb memory.
5.Message your mom in the kitchen that you will have dinner now, and that you prefer you vegetables stir fried.
TRANSPORT/CONVEYANCE :
1.Play annoying ringtones on your cellphone just to announce to all that you have indeed watched the latest bollywood flop or have downloaded the latest Justin Bieber album.
2.Share with everyone how you were completely exasperated over the fact that your dog pooped in the baby's crib thinking it was a litter box.. as well as the listener's horrified reaction over the speakerphone.
3.Pretend to be texting/calling someone while waiting alone to avoid people's stares.
4.If you're a low-life to show "Hey I may not get 2 meals / day but check out my new iphone!! "

Photocredit : textually.org

WORKPLACE/COLLEGE/SCHOOL :
1.Take embarrassing photos of your colleagues to be uploaded to your favourite social networking site soon after.
2.Secretly take pics of the girl you had a bigtime crush on.
3.Secretly take pics/vids of staff acting dumb. (uploaded to social networking site)
4.Use WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONAIRE (KBC) options in an exam : phone a friend, expert advice, audience vote !
5.Ask your friend who's in class to give you proxy as you are watching the latest 3D movie.


CONCERT/PUBLIC EVENTS:
Take blurry , out of focus pics to show everyone "Dude! I was there ! And I was just THIS far away from him/them!!!" Yup my friend, very far.

Je veux dormir!!!!

If any of you have lived in a college hostel, you would very well understand my predicament. Prior to my college days, I used to abide by the policy , early to bed, early to rise... But all that changed once I joined my college... At first, it was easy to continue my earlier routine... But as friendships and acquaintances were made, it was an increasingly daunting task...

Conversations used to last till 1 am in the morning..resulting in me sleeping in lectures, in my favourite first bench....( Tis a well known fact that no one concentrates on front bench student )

Let me describe in brief : Nightlife in a hostel and the various nocturnal species that make their rounds.
With timeframe for ease of reading.
10 PM : Closure of HES (Hostel entertainment system - TV)
11 PM : The rounds by the master predator (the warden) start...he wanders through his territory of 3 floors, looking for unsuspecting prey, his favourite prey being the young and defenseless ones( 1st yrs).
12 AM : The prey sense that danger has passed, and emerge from their burrows (rooms) to forage for food , drink and smaller prey... Some of the pack hunters assemble in the corridor, planning their attack
1 AM : Some solitary predators hunting alone prefer to take their prey by the element of surprise, attacking in their most vulnerable state : the state of sleep
2 AM : Some nocturnal males , start calling their mates, this process may last till sunrise...

Internship brought temporary relief; but even this was peppered with unwanted phone calls in the middle of the night...I contemplated getting myself one of those sleep pods in those sci-fi movies....And that bottle of pills looked very tempting...!

Now having completed my internship and this blog entry, permit me to attain the state that I have been searching for - a state of perfect blissful sleep!!!!! :D