Life as a med intern and bachelor - EP6 - Cure for the b***h

photocredit layoutsparks.com

No folks, you haven't read my title wrong....I don't plan to do a write-up on mushrooms from the netherworld anytime soon.

Perhaps all of you have had atleast one of these in your workplace. In fact, I may even go further to say, any workplace would be incomplete without one of these despicable characters; just like every comic book has a villain.

A few characteristics are worthy of note:

The workplace b***h for some inexplicable reason, happens to be present in the very department you work in.

He/she somehow happens to notice any minor goof-up that you apparently thought was made in utmost secrecy.

He/she is a creative genius....remember that small goof-up we just talked about earlier? Apparently, the effects from that goof-up were equivalent to a nuclear bomb blowing up in your backyard...Kudos to the guy who said that imagination and innovation go hand-in-hand...Wait a second, I think it was me; I kick myself in disgust.

Another characteristic of this creature , who I will henceforth be calling "it" (definitely not human) is its ability to watch your every move with utmost diligence...It also possesses some sort of telepathic ability; the boss is never too far when it's around.

It somehow manages to portray itself as the victim of one of your dastardly diabolical schemes which you have no idea of in the first place and strangely expects you to soften your stance towards it.

A more sophisticated subspecies exists in med school, I've come across quite a few of them during my rotations.

Surely , all of you must be thinking , "Why tell me everything that I already know! Just tell me how to get rid of it!"

Allow me to let you in on "The cure for the b***h" , a sure shot cure for all those poor folk who've been victims of the horrendous acts perpetrated by these beings....

1. Pretend they don't exist; while this may initially lead to an escalation of their atrocities, they get bored quite easily - they have the attention span of a goldfish.
2. Practice working in stealth mode; the less they see, the less they know, less damage control. You may want to take some lessons in speed from Flash Gordon as well.
3. Contemplate purchasing a dartboard, place their picture on it and take a few shots...leave it in plain view...
4. Confront them and tell them that you're in reality a werewolf that preys on b***h blood.
5. Look for a dealer in adamantium exoskeletons.
If all fails, contact the terminator. I'll be back!